Here’s my rather composed ‘Before’ picture from Parkrun yesterday, the first that I’ve completed for over two and a half years. I heard that the massive worldwide event was now back after a long absence so I thought that I’d rise and shine early to make the 9am start.
And here’s the ‘After’. Blimey, what happened? Who let that Ribena Berry into my car? I stayed that colour for a good hour.
Parkrun is brilliantly inclusive and encompasses people of all abilities. There are the racing snakes that complete the 5K run well within twenty minutes. And then there are those who meander around at the back,. Like me. Hot Stuff, who by the way was still completing his Saturday lie in when I got home, killed himself laughing when I told him that I’d been overtaken by a woman with a very heavy pushchair and also by a gent in his eighties who was power walking! For some reason I’m a lot slower in a competitive environment than I am on my usual runs even though they’re hillier. Perhaps a sports psychologist could get to the bottom of that.
I took this picture with my nose! Could this be a new genre of photography? It’s to mark the occasion of using my special Parkrun wristband for the first time. The lovely volunteers scan it at the end of each race and my results are uploaded to a central database. The band was a birthday present from Louis a couple of years ago. It’s got his phone number on it in case I die halfway round the course. My fitness tracker is by Xiaomi. known as the Chinese Apple. Our entire household are converted to this tech brand since Louis bought a phone a few years back. My watch showed me that done over 9,000 steps before 10 o’ clock this morning. No wonder the urge to have a post lunch siesta overtook me.
I listened to music from Spotify on my way round, tucking my phone into my sports bra. I learnt this handy storage trick from a girl that I once met as a wedding. She was much bigger up top than me but seemed to have a rucksack full of stuff stored between her cleavage. I looked on in disbelief as she retrieved all the normal handbag accoutrements from in between her boobies. So Seasick Steve joined me on my little jog via my Bluetooth link to Spotify. He’d hadn’t been on my radar until I saw him at the festival where I took this fuzzy picture last month. Who couldn’t fall in love with a sprightly septuagenarian who plays the most amazing blues on makeshift guitars? If he’d been running in person he’d have probably pipped me to the post too!