Let me introduce my boyfriend and give him a suitable nickname. ‘Hot Stuff’ will do nicely! This isn’t because he’s ripped and has film star good looks. The hippy nonsense about my belief that I manifested him may follow in a later post. However, I’ll disclose for now that in my list of ‘what I want in a boyfriend’ (yes I really did write one), I forgot to specify anything about appearance. It darned slipped my mind. So I’ve ended up with a fifty something white bloke with thinning hair, glasses and a bit of a belly to match my own. And there was me thinking that the universe should have known that I was after an Idris Elba lookalike anyway. ‘You must be joking!’ I inwardly shouted to an unspecified higher being after I’d just met Hot Stuff on our first date. ‘I’m certainly not.’ they retorted. ‘Just go with this.’ I’m glad I did. The nickname fits because he’s a heating engineer and his raison d’etre is keeping people warm and toasty!
We met online, a pretty standard way to find a partner in the noughties. It seemed worth another go at a time when my bevy of gay male friends were trying to set me up with an elderly neighbour. ‘But he has a sea view!’ they said when I remonstrated. I decided then that I might be able to do better under my own steam. So I signed up to a dating site and Hot Stuff turned up after a couple of months. I have to say that his profile pictures weren’t giving much away, a distant shot of him in the surf, a moment where he’d been captured from behind falling off his mountain bike and a fuzzy five year old picture where he had more hair than now and was wearing contact lenses. Okay I’ll ‘fess up now and say the Idris Elba spiel above was largely for comic effect. I’d didn’t have much of a clue about what he looked like but had already worked out that he wasn’t black!
I responded to a tentative advance from him after I’d got over the fact that his profile had spelling mistakes. Geez! I must have changed. In the old days that would have been a no-no. But with a son diagnosed with dyslexia I’ve become more enlightened about learning differences. On the face of it, Hot Stuff seemed interesting and outdoorsy in spite of mistaking ‘there’ and ‘their’. I took my sanctimonious grammar police helmet off and responded to his cheesy ‘wink’.
It turns out he’s is very intelligent indeed. Without having to put pen to paper, he can more than adequately string words together. He’s inquiring and curious and very sharp. Funny and kind are in there too. Best of all, he can turn his hand to anything practical. In my book that’s far more useful than knowing how to use a semi-colon.
I thought that poor Klaus the Knaus, my ageing motorhome was on its last legs. His ceiling was leaking, the water pump had gone home and the floor was rotting. Now that’s all been fixed , and Klaus has been restored to vintage loveliness. Hot Stuff has fallen in love with the great big German home on wheels too He’s treated him to extra solar panels, wheel trims to make him look prettier, a new loo and a fancy arrangement connecting the main and leisure battery. Hot Stuff thinks that he might be chucked after all the repairs are done. But Klaus, who I’ve pictured here because Hot Stuff is too shy to be shown off in public, is old. My whole house is in need of some TLC from a guy with an impressive tool bag too. There will always be more little jobs!