Cotton Buds

Every box of cotton buds comes with instructions that they should not be stuck in people’s ears. I find this absolutely amazing. For they are the only everyday item that springs to mind where the product warning describes exactly what they are most used for. Now I have been getting deafer recently. My speech is getting louder because I can’t hear myself talk properly. Possibly my balance is a little up the creek too. So I’ve promised Hot Stuff soon that I will make a GP appointment to discuss this. But in the meantime I thought that I’d see if the problem is to do with a build up of ear wax and try some self treatment.

So I bought a little squirty bottle of ear spray and started using it on holiday. I supplemented my purchase with some ‘bastoncillos cotonetes’ from a Spanish supermarket. That’s cotton buds in Spanish, a phrase that Duolingo hadn’t prepared me for. They also come with a health warning. Hot Stuff decided that his ears needed a good clear out too. We’ve been grossing each other out with the detritus that was coming out of our respective lug holes. That’s intimacy for you. We never knew that a bodily procedure could be so entertaining.

But silly sausages! It seems that the warning on the cotton bud box should really have been heeded. With hindsight I should have known. I once removed the blackened tip of one that Louis had lost in his ear as a child. I’m now even more deaf than before and have developed tinnitus. So has Hot Stuff. Probably all that poking and prodding wasn’t a good idea. It’s probably compacted the ear wax We are really rather grumpy because we can’t hear each other. I’m hoping the problem goes away before I see the doc. If it doesn’t I might blame the problem on swimmer’s ear and not ‘fess up that it could be self inflicted.

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