B&B Doll’s House

Local museums can be a cornucopia of curiosities. Part of their attraction is that collections often are so random. The main purpose of my visit to Southend’s Central Museum was to see the treasure trove from the Saxon King’s burial chamber. But there’s other things too that caught my eye too. It includes a caseful of treasure made in the town’s long gone EKCO factory. However among an exhibit celebrating the town’s seaside heritage I feel blessed to have found the B&B Doll’s House.

Of course my childhood town of Southend-on-Sea has long been known for its good old fashioned no nonsense ‘kiss me quick’ feel. Although someone made the doll’s house in the 1980s it tries to capture the ambience of a bed and breakfast stay in the town’s 1950s heyday.

Never mind that it doesn’t quite get it right. Surely there should be a teddy boy on that doll’s house B&B balcony. Or maybe the wannabe Sid Vicious is a time traveller.

I love the diversity of the clientele. My favourite party of guests has to be the family performing their ablutions in the bathroom. But this guest caught my eye. Is she just an innocent glamour puss or a lady of the night?

And nearby is a totally different guest, the Queen taking an incognito break with a corgi perhaps. Thank goodness for her majesty that pets were allowed.

One of the things that I loved about the B&B doll’s house was that there were plenty of happenings outside as well as within its exterior. These lovely sunbathers for instance. Surely there should be a towel reserving that empty deckchair. Or maybe in bygone days people didn’t do that.

And it must have been a swanky joint. There’s a pool out back replete with body positive bathers.

No time to get bored here. There’s a snooker table in the conservatory. I haven’t quite captured the bloke playing with the fag in his mouth. That baize is in danger of being ruined! And if you’re peckish between meals there’s always the ‘Gristle and Gravy’ snack bar. Now doesn’t that sound appetising!

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